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    • May
      7
      2008

      i.hEart.nYc

      Written by eLbie in zEn at 4:59 pm on May, 7 2008

      who -  a very excited young lady that will soon return to her city of drEams…

      what - go after your dreams no matter what the opposition.
      when - May 15, 2008 12:06 pm
      where - milan.3.boutique [englewood, nj] 

      where do i even start. i been MIA for a few, but i assure you it is because LIVING got so good to stop and write about it.  this past week or so has been somewhat of a surreal dream. i was feeling suffocated so i had to roll out and change my environment. [y'all know how i do] i can’t allow stress to play in my daily life for too long. and i must say, it was getting a little hectic for me. in spite of all my feng shui splendor, my bedroom was beginning to look a mess. i didn’t feel like making my bed, didn’t feel like folding the clean clothes, didn’t want to even think about fluffing all my pretty pillows or lighting my delicious candles… i knew deep down that i wasn’t at peace. in talking to my beSty about my woEs, she graciously invited me to camp out with her for a few days. i SOOO ♥ her!  she’s the beSSSt!  

      i relaxed in the quiet, worked on my magazine layout, enjoyed the stillness and got to unwind on the solo tip.

      then i began to think about the various outlets that were readily available to me in my city… [i.e. nyc].  why was i not there right now? why has it taken me SO long to realize that [once again] i have outgrown chocolate city.  or has it outgrown me?  whatever it may be- we sure ain’t compatible. don’t get me wrong all you dc lovers, i know the charm it possesses, especially the museums and the historical monuments. BUT- i’m over it honey. SO over it. 

      back to ny.

      i came here for ‘a few days’  and almost 2 weeks later, i’m still here. 

      my dearest cousin Martha [martiye] has a HOT boutique in englewood and needed help feng shui-ing her surroundings.  2 kids, a budding social life, and a strong desire for beautiful and organized work and home spaces.  well, it was natural for me to dive right in and do what i do. 

      she said ‘elbie- HELP!’  so i got the credit card from her, jumped into the truck towards tar-jay. i started off on what would end up being a 3-day process.

      we solved storage problems, put things where they belong, put away last stuff from last season, threw away stuff that was broken by the kids, revamped their room/closet, her room/closet… it went on and on. we stayed up till 3 am for 3 nights getting it done. then we had to open the store by 10 am, so i was in there getting the store to look like it was there and not in the ‘process’ of GETTING there… 

      3 days later- BAM!  shit was practically flawless… and at the end of it all Martiye was SOOOOO pleased with the transformation, she messed around and got me 2 clients. by her gushing about me and what ‘i did for her’, they were like ‘have her come over to my house before the month is up, please!!!’ 

      little does she know what she did for me.

      *sigh*  i love it here…. planets line up with my moon, and shit just falls into place 

      let me go- thank you for reading. i promise next time will be MUCH more interesting. *wink*

      before i go- i wanted to thank Nolawi for doing a write-up on me on his blog , what’s more interesting is the comments that his readers made.  read it and let me know what y’all think. 
         

      smooches…


      168 Responseshttp://www.elbieinc.com/2008/05/iheartnyc/i.hEart.nYc2008-05-07+21%3A59%3A00eLbie
      May
      2
      2008

      accept what u can’t change…

      Written by eLbie in zEn at 3:26 pm on May, 2 2008

      who- a gorgeous caterpillar that truly appreciates the process BEFORE the buttErfLy… :)
      what- true power is in LETTING GO.
      when- written yesterday evening.. posted 4:30 pm today…
      where- was at beSty’s last night.. now at ‘home’….


      these past couple of days have presented somewhat of a challenge… been face to face with rather uncomfortable situations that clearly will not change. ESPECIALLY since i want them to change so badly.

      things that just are. not necessarily bad or good. just there.

      i guess it comes with being so passionate. we care and care to our very own detriment. the extreme and generous love that we are SO capable of giving, turns into the worst kind of pain when it isn’t reciprocated exactly how we want it, and when…

      and it’s paralyzing pain at that. it just can’t be ok for this to happen.

      to personalize this, i will have to discuss my situation. well basically i have been putting myself in a situation that i sincerely had good intentions of handling, but i just wasn’t ready to handle it properly.

      it deals with a family member so you already know that makes it an even touchier subject. have u ever loved someone to death, but couldn’t comfortably be in the same room with them for longer than 5 minutes? ok- TEN if you’re tipsy.

      what IS that?

      i’m just saying. why the hell should i have to be SO dispositioned and discombobulated based on some human being’s personality [or the lack thereof]? even if it is a member of my own flesh and blood crew.

      i’m talking deeply disturbed. skin-crawling, gut-wrenching, nauseous-feeling- disturbed.

      that’s just not ok now is it? two things have to happen here sweeties. either you get over yourself and all your ‘feelings’ –or- STOP being around that muthafukka!!

      ultimately, truE.pEacE can’t come from the words or actions of another. i tell myself over and over that the sooner i stop this dumb ass search, the sooner imma actually find it!

      easier said than done. i know. but i’m glad to at least know which is the more zEn road to take.

      one, how people view themselves, is simply self-opinion. most of the time, it’s even delusional. and, two, how people view you, is simply an opinion too! so why be all offended and such just because you come across someone that appears righteous, judgmental, or even insanely conceited? yea, initially, it feels like they’re attacking your essence, but in actuality, it is your own insecurities that are attacking you.

      at the end of the day boo boo, YOU are in fact causing your own pain.

      * sigh *

      imma hafta meditate on that one for a minute. do you hear me??? a LONG minute. cuz honey! it’s haaaaard holding back the urge to inform somebody of the big moronic idiot that they are brilliantly emulating.
      but silence is SO golden…. trust me. it’s SO much more poignant when you stand there and just look at them with the “u’z a dumb bitch” look.
      honey, the truth is HUGE and it’s KNOWN! it so IS. you need not defend it under any circumstances.

      “the truth needs no defense…” –A.N.E. –e. tolle-

      be good y’all…

      sidebar- im mad that i’m missing the Kentucky derby AGAIN…. [what] my pretty southern church hat that i wanted to wear!!! my fruity drink with the umbrella in it, as i watch the horsies do their thing….!!!!!!!! UGHHHH!!!!! [looking around to find someone o blame] LDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!

      151 Responsehttp://www.elbieinc.com/2008/05/accept-what-u-can%e2%80%99t-change%e2%80%a6/accept+what+u+can%E2%80%99t+change%E2%80%A62008-05-02+20%3A26%3A00eLbie
        • ::DISCLAIMER::

          welcome to my blog... i write everyday. i'm very random. intensely emotional. constantly seek zen in everything

          |a walking contradiction|

          i'm a freelance writer so don't get confused [or get it twisted] by the very improper way that i write on this blog. these thoughts are personal not business. that's different. :) iloveyou4reading.



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