[currently] in some quiet space getting a lot of work done. i swear being in DC slows me down. i guess i’m a slave to my own pleasure principle. if i don’t like it, i can’t work. period.
today i got caught up on some letters that i had to send to some folks for business opportunities. also got a big chunk of my branding plan done for mr. hunt cuz imma need my web presence to be a LOT hotter than this. i mean really, back in the days of elbieinc.com [for those that knew of me back then. but please don't go to the site now cuz they hacked and stole my domain to turn it into NOTHING] i was KILLING it. but now, with all the new webstuff that’s out and HOT - umm YA i need to step it up.
thanks.
i will end this blog by ranting, so forgive me in advance. my blog= my therapy.
i truly love and ADORE my parental units. i have tried all my life to please them and make them proud of me. in this day and age, we have somehow fallen off a wagon that we were never even really ON. the wagon of communication. it makes me sad because it is my ultimate wish of alllll wishes to be close to them and have them love me in all my ‘inappropriate’ behavior. for them to shake their head and say “you’re crazy child. you do randomness that we would never do, but we wouldn’t have you any other way. and we love you just the same.” in the pursuit of that, i think i lost and neglected- ME. not only that, but that notion of unconditional love from them has almost turned into a foreign concept when it really shouldn’t.
although, they have never said those words per se, i know the love me desperately. as i- them. it’s just that… when it comes to self-preservation and personal expression, i have to choose me over them. i have to chose to live the life that i desire even if they can’t give me their approval.
life is short, and times are hard. i will always pray for that ground of ‘agreeing to disagree’. i love u mommy and daddy. no matter how many things i do that might make you angry or hurt.
please just know that i am just trying to express myself and be ME- NOT hurt you.
ok- i’m done.
peace and love!!!
p.s. i TOLD YOU brit-brit was gonna be #1 her 1st week…. nearly 500k copies sold honey. get into it. :D
look how cute my little boo boo is. i sooooooo love her!!!! my god.baby ‘kj’ - look how she is still looking at herself when i give her a biiig smoooooch. :D. she’s 1.
ok let’s see… i have some things on my mind today. i feel a rebellion coming on people. i’m serious. i was watching the britney spears ‘for the record’ thingie that was on MTV and i’m telling YOU…. i’m getting tired of being bullied by those that have the privilege of me giving a fukk about them. taking my kindness for weakness will not get you far IDIOTS.
seriously now, how much longer do you think i’m gonna keep quietly treading along the waters that have been silently approved by you??? let me help you out - the road has come to a DEAD END boo boo.
i’m in a place of comfort that is radiating from within… and INSPITE of the bull shit. you wanna talk??? imma give you something to talk about TRUST ME.
there is only one stamp of approval that i need and HONEY, i BEEN stamped with that ink- on the beautiful day i was born back in 1976. OK???? and it spells ‘ G-O-D’
thaaaaaaaanks.
ok i go now!
thank you for reading!!!! CLICK the ‘follow this blog’ thingie on the right side and stop being lazy and create a google account!!!! gmail is good to have anyway!!!
[currently] at the dining room table chez mon parents… thinking about life and eating chips and dip. bbc on in the background.
i have to touch on a couple of topics but the most important one being, AIDS awareness and protection. it is beyond me that people in this day and age still think that it is ok to have casual/unprotected sex whenever their hormones tell them to. *sigh* it’s just too dangerous people. i love you too much to go out like that.
the 2nd thing i wanted to say was that i am very disappointed in these so-called ‘organizations’ out here that are set up in these exclusive and alienating churches. it seems that think they are too good for us regular folk that aren’t in complete denial of our ‘transgressions’ and ‘worldly’ ways. they preach no sex before marriage to the people that preach the same thing. what are you changing?? are you reaching out to people that don’t want to be ‘partners’ of your billion dollar church with the paid-off private jet? what if they needed someone to take the time out and talk to them about abstaining from, not pre-marital but, pre-mature sex. is that too much?? will it tarnish your law degrees and your mbas if you talk to highschool dropouts??
i doubt it.
the problem is the fake-ness, the elitism, and the hypocritical nature of the church today. preach one thing, and then behind closed doors, do the opposite. exact reason why i gave up on religion and looked at the God that lives within me for spiritual guidance.
[thank you to bscott, for introducing me to this song. ]
welcome to my blog... i write everyday. i'm very random. intensely emotional. constantly seek zen in everything
|a walking contradiction|
i'm a freelance writer so don't get confused [or get it twisted] by the very improper way that i write on this blog. these thoughts are personal not business. that's different. :) iloveyou4reading.
